‘No, I can’t – I’ve tried before’.
How many times have you heard yourself or someone close to you say it? Why not? What is standing in your way that keeps you from being more of you than you’ve ever dreamed possible?
Is it you, my friend? People can create their lives through choices they make. You can call it a bad habit, but still … you are the one choosing it.
So HOW can I keep my New Year’s resolution?
That’s an acronym coined in the journal Management Review in 1981 for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time-bound.
So your New Year’s resolution should:
be absolutely clear and specific
be possible to track (progress check)
be realistic — actually be within your reach
really matter to you
be given enough time to be achieved
According to Judson Brewer’s TED talk, our bad habits are formed on the basis of a primary brain learning process called:
positive and negative reinforcement
And it goes like this:
Trigger—> Behaviour —> Reward
See chocolate —> Eat chocolate—> Feel good
… and can only be broken by using curiosity.
And curiosity is really looking at new possibilities for you.
You can watch this TED Talk here to discover the science behind habits:
Now, some real-life examples:
Bad Habit: I check Facebook too often.
Trigger: I feel isolated.
Behaviour: I check Facebook.
Reward: I feel connected.
Way to change the behavior: Instead of checking Facebook, get up and talk to a colleague or join an interesting class and meet new people.
Bad Habit: I don’t sleep enough.
Trigger: I feel like I need time for myself in the evening.
Behaviour: I stay up too late watching TV.
Reward: I’m entertained.
Way to change the behavior: Instead of staying up late to watch TV, carve out special time each day to spend by yourself, even if that may mean asking for help with your children or taking a break from work each day.
Finding a substitute for something is crucial when it comes to fighting addictions and bad habits (at least for the first 21 days of withdrawal). On long-term basis it is developing good habits that will provide stability.
Oh, and if you break down — don’t judge yourself too much.
In `The Power of Habit´ Charles Duhigg wrote:
So, are you feeling uncomfortable with your language skills?
Would you like to develop a good habit of learning?
What choices do you have?
Be clear on what would really be fun for you.
Maybe all it requires is calling Escola Innova and asking Sylvia to help you choose one of our language groups.
You will never know unless you try it!